ronandhappiness:

I’m angry and I have to rant about movie!hermione so please bear with me.

Let’s talk about the chapter when Harry shared a kiss with Cho Chang.

Now, in the books, when Harry recalled his kiss with Cho Chang, Ron playfully accused him of being a bad kisser. Harry started worrying about that, to which Hermione absent-mindedly said, “Of course you’re not.” Then we got a cute jelly!ron moment. Bear in mind that Hermione was writing a long, break-up letter to Krum, so it’s not a big deal that she said that. We all say stupid shit during situations when we’re multi-tasking, when our minds are somewhere else. It’s cool. It’s a human error.

However, in the movies, Hermione was not writing any damn letter. Both Ron and Hermione were carefully listening to Harry and giving him their undivided attention. When Ron made a joke about Harry’s kissing, this what our darling movie!hermione said:

…

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

“I’m sure Harry’s kissing was more than satisfactory.”

“I’m sure Harry’s kissing was more than satisfactory.”

“I’m sure Harry’s kissing was more than satisfactory.”

This, in my opinion, is the worst thing to come out of movie!hermione’s mouth. More than satisfactory? Is she a fucking idiot? What the fuck is wrong with her? WHOSE CLEVER IDEA WAS IT TO WRITE THIS LINE? Suuure. Say that in front of the guy you like, Hermione. What do I know? After all, you are the brightest witch of your age™ (Seriously, does she use most of her brains on her homework, and has nothing left when she starts talking to Ron?) Fuck Movie!hermione.

❌Warning: you are entering a movie!hermione bashing zone.❌

Now, even I know the real Hermione is capable of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, but if she ever said this, she’d immediately blush, and start stammering. The next thing to come out of her mouth would probably be something like, “What the fuck did I just say? Have the Harmione shippers finally possessed me? Oh crap, Ron please don’t look at me. Wizard God, take me now.” She would not say it to Ron with an entitled attitude, as if it’s general knowledge that Harry’s kissing is “more than satisfactory.” Get the fuck out of here.

I’m aware that Kloves did not write the script, so I can’t trash-talk him. However, he did plant the seed and Yates was in charge of Ootp. Any reasonable writer would not make Hermione say this. This a line worthy coming out off the mouth of a Hermione Granger that lives in a Harmione fan fiction. So yeah. I take back any nice thing I said about this movie. I don’t give a fuck if Ootp was a better movie, simply because Kloves had kept his filthy hands off of our characters. I don’t care about that. I don’t care if there was lots of eye-sex between Ron and Hermione. I don’t care if Book!Ron made an appearance. I don’t care if they got Luna’s character right. I don’t care if Book!Ginny made an appearance for two seconds. I don’t care if Imelda Staunton nailed the role of Umbridge. I don’t care if Radcliffe’s acting was good. Why? Because movie!hermione was just as insufferable as she was in the other movies. Because I can’t like any movie that contains Movie!Hermione and her “I’m better than all of you” attitude.

No comment. I’m just here to bask in the glow of your anger @ronandhappiness