Once Ron kissed Hermione leaving for work. Harry joked “oh no kisses for me??”… Ron apologized and kissed his temple. Harry was as red as a tomato, Hermione was rolling with laughter
Bold of you to assume Hermione wouldn’t get jealous.
Bold of you to assume that Hermione wouldn’t encourage her partner to give affection to his best mate, too. #platonicloveisvitaltoo
Once Ron kissed Hermione leaving for work. Harry joked “oh no kisses for me??”… Ron apologized and kissed his temple. Harry was as red as a tomato, Hermione was rolling with laughter
Bold of you to assume Hermione wouldn’t get jealous.
Okay so me and my Tumblr wife Ayesha were chatting and we saw a ridiculous “Hinny is Oedipus Complex and Romione isn’t intellectually compatible” post and it being the morning for me (yeah 12:55 AM is the morning sue me) I kinda went off on a tangent…
Anyway here you go lovelies
@ronandhappiness
a dude accidentally fucked his mom (and then when he found out, was so traumatized that he killed himself) and this twat Sigmund Freud being a crusty dude that he is assumed that he must have enjoyed it @vivithefolle
Exactly
Well, actually, Oedipus didn’t exactly kill himself
@vivithefolle He was prophesized to kill his father and fuck his mother
So his father and mother sent one of their servant to drown him as a baby
But the servant took pity on baby Oedipus and instead raised him as his own son (note: sometimes Oedipus is taken in by the King of Corinth) @vivithefolle
Then Oedipus one day heard about the city of Thebes that was plagued by a Sphinx, who devoured the travellers who didn’t answer her question correctly (and also devoured Thebes’ citizens on a whim)
So Oedipus starts walking towards Thebes and comes accross this old noble dude
And Old Noble Dude is being kind of a bitch to Oedipus so Oedipus kills him, because that’s how it worked back then, you just don’t wait for the police, you ARE the police
Then Oedipus finds the Sphinx, answers her riddle correctly, and the Sphinx dies mad about it (literally)
And the prize for killing the Sphinx was… the Queen of Thebes
So Oedipus marries the Queen of Thebes and they start having children and it’s great for a while
But then Thebes is plagued by… well by the Plague, funnily enough
And Oedipus asks the oracles why the fuck is his city being plagued @ronandhappiness
Oh so the Queen is his mom
@vivithefolle
And one of the oracles, Tiresias, a blind seer, tells Oedipus “bro you’re not gonna like this”
@ronandhappiness
Lmaoo @vivithefolle
And Oedipus is all “fuck u dude, tell me what’s going on with my fcking city”
And Tiresias says “Well, let’s imagine, just imagine, that one man has killed his father, then married and fucked his own mother”
Oedipus goes “holy shit who’s that sick son of a bitch”
“In psychology classes, you are taught that “Opposites Attract” only applies to flings, short passion-filled fun things that are in no way serious or hoping to be permanent”
…
um
sorry buddy but
MAYBE PSYCHOLOGY ISN’T ALWAYS 10000% CORRECT?
LIKE BITCH YOU TALK ABOUT FREUD AND THE OEDIPUS COMPLEX DINGUS EVERY FUCKING PSYCHOLOGIST IS LAUGHING THEIR BOLLOCKS OFF AT FREUD’S THEORIES
IF YOU HAD A SMIDGE OF CRITICAL THINKING PERHAPS YOU’D BE A GOOD PSYCHOLOGIST
BUT I’M NOT HOLDING MUCH HOPE YOU DUMBFUCK Moving on to the “intellectual compatibility” nonsense
“So if we believe that Hermione values intellectual pursuits”
I’m pretty sure Hermione values HER intellectual pursuits
but not those of others
remember when Harry was in a snit about the Deathly Hallows
Hermione sure wasn’t all “omg!!! magical ancient artefacts!!! totally must find them!! think of the HISTORY!!! harry you beautiful intellectual beast make love to me”
@ronandhappiness
“harry you beautiful intellectual beast make love to me”
STOP @vivithefolle
she was all “wow harry you’re gonna believe a kid’s tale. 100%. your stupidest idea yet. you dumb fuck. i can’t believe you’re not dead yet. if it weren’t for me and Ron you’d never have survived ever.”
MEANWHILE Ron is all “eeeeeeeeeeeeh maybe harry’s right and the hallows exist but mate we gotta sort out our priorities, we can go Indiana Jones-ing magical artefacts later” @ronandhappiness
And then they called Ron useless and dumb lmaooooo fuck off
@vivithefolle bitch
and Ron ACTUALLY makes Hermione laughs and guess what
HUMOUR IS A PART OF INTELLECTUAL STIMULATION
I KNOW. MIND-BLOWING.
LAUGH IS ACTUALLY A RESPONSE FROM OUR BODY TO INTELLECTUAL STIMULI.
CAN
YOU
BELIEVE
IT
@ronandhappiness
“no no i don’t hate ron I just think insert bullshit about ron being so bad for perfect goddess hermione”
Really?
@vivithefolle
also fuck off but chess is like the most intellectually stimulating game in the fucking world and Hermione is shit at it while Ron is brilliant so
I think that Sapiosexual!Hermione’s gonna go for that sexy freckled arse in any possible universe if you catch my drift
@ronandhappiness
Exactly.
Honestly, at the end of the day, I blame that stupidass “emotional teaspoon” line.
Because anti romiones see that as “proof” that their precious Hermione isn’t on the same “level” as nasty ron
While those of us who have brains and can think, know that this is just an example of Hermione’s hypocrisy
@vivithefolle Sapio!Hermione: *jumps at Ron after he trounces her at chess* You beautiful fucking asshole how dare you be so intelligent and not show it more.
Ron: *blushing* Her-Hermione, we’re in the common roo- AH!
S!Hermione: *straddling him* I’m going to ravish you so badly you have no fucking idea. Our kids will be geniuses. More clever than Albert fucking Einstein. My grades and your chess brain. My academical power and your ability to make everyone laugh themselves to Heaven. Oh my god even your freckles are puzzles how are you so damn sexy.
So what did we learn?
We learned that Vivi has the biggest potty mouth when she’s tired and that she floods poor Ayesha’s chatbox
Also that Romione is canon forever but was there ever any doubt?
YOU FORGOT THE NEXT PART WHEN I ASKED YOU NOT TO POST THIS BECAUSE YOU ARE MINE AND I WANT YOU ALL FOR MYSELF (Nah, I kid. It’s your masterpiece, therefore you can do whatever you want with it, and the world deserves some Hermione pouncing on Ron.)
BUT THIS IS THE BEST “ROMIONE PLAYS CHESS AU” I’VE EVER READ.
LIKE EVERYONE TALKS ABOUT HERMIONE BEATING RON AT CHESS AND BEING BETTER THAN HIM
my dude my man…..stop
I’ll bet Ron plays even HARDER when he’s playing chess with Hermione and I’m sure Hermione finds that even more intellectually stimulating.
Anyways I love Vivi and her enthusiastic commentaries and her potty mouth.
@vivithefolle@ronandhappiness You two are just the best and it’s a privilege to know you both. I swear, I couldn’t stop laughing towards the end of this post. You two really put a smile on my face.
Although I personally think Ron is the sapiosexual one of the two, I can get behind the idea of Hermione being super into Ron’s strategic mind, and having to restrain herself when he beats her at chess because she’s so attracted to him.
Pure fucking gold
Wow, @vivithefolle going full-on Ronmione smut on main 😉
@lytefoot Couldn’t keep this masterpiece all to myself now could I 😉
@headcanonsandmore – as someone who is Sapiosexual (it’s inside the Demi but I digress) that kind of intellect is, not so much an aphrodisiac but a “I won’t have anyone who can’t abcd intellectually.” I turned down quite a few dates in my time because the person wasn’t smarter than I was.
It’s rude to admit (’course this was before I got married to a brilliant man) but every single person I dated (not just guys, either, even if they were more platonic dates and still are!) is in one way or another, smarter than I am.
I can sooooo see Ron being Sapio (even if @vivithefolle has me seeing him kinda prudish too, now!) but also demi (where once he knows the person, they turn him on, brains being a bowl of pudding on top.)
But dating? Casual affairs? I don’t see it (not the way he’s written in canon.)
@diva-gonzo Whoops, sorry; I didn’t mean to imply that. Beg pardon.
Yeah, I can easily see Ron as Sapio, since he seems (at least, with Hermione) to admire intelligence and wit in a person. And I see him as Demi too, since he (aside from adolescent crushes and attraction brought on by Veela-powers) rarely has any interest in someone that he doesn’t know very well.
@headcanonsandmore – No need to apologize, dear. (And if I was gonna fuss at all, it’d be in private. It’s otherwise rude.) I was pointing out my issue with being sapiosexual – where it’s a complicated situation of “they just aren’t that intellectually attractive” as opposed to “Well this bloke is stupid so I won’t go out with him” rubbish.
Now if he knew someone? Yeah, he’d date them. (Cough Luna or Hermione or Harry Cough)
Fair enough. I was worried I’d got my definitions mixed up.
And I very much agree with Ron getting to know someone before he dates them (#romione #runa #rarry)
Let’s be honest, Harry’s more likely to kiss Ron than he is to kiss Hermione.
True. I think he wanted to.
I think they did. Just as an impulse after Ron wakes him up from a nightmare or something and he just thanks him and smacks him on the Lips and it should feel weird but it didn’t and it sort of becomes a thing and it’s not romantic or anything just calming
@rose-grangerweasleyisbae that is the cutest and most accurate thing and thank you for writing that down. I didn’t know how much I needed to have that in my head!💖💖
And then Imagine Draco and Pansy doing the same and both he and Harry are super scared about what their spouse will think of that until they discover they both do it and they’re so Relieved and just…
Soft Drarry and Ron&Harry and draco&pansy brotps are my life
I’m just trying to imagine Ron Straight Boi Weasley minorly freaking out because Harry the Bi Who Lived just kissed him, but then realizes it was completely platonic.
You’re not annoying me at all, Anon! 😀
Thought I’m super frustrated because I’ve read one very long fic that
has Ron searching for Harry, who has amnesia and ran away to America
(and is gay but nobody knew that) and Ron realizes he’s in love with
Harry and the fic has about 30 chapters and it’s on FFN but I can’t find
it!! x_x
Sooo… I didn’t find that many long fics but I can give you a long list of them if you want?
Beautiful Friend
It took six years for Harry to learn something in History of Magic. This one. Oh my lord this one… it’s short, but it’s amazing. It’s full of lovely lively details and Harry’s description of Ron is… aaaww.
Life Drawing
Dean watches, and sees something unexpected. Again, the descriptions! My lord the descriptions, and also you will relate very much to Dean if you’ve ever worked with pencils.
Harry has no idea how to tell his best friend he wants more that
friendship. He’s pretty sure this would be hell of a lot easier if he
knew for sure how Ron felt about him. This one is plenty cute. Ron is adorable and Harry… Harry’s trying his best. :’D
Our Inner Beasts Later, Madam Pomfrey would tell them that both Bill and Ron were going
to survive. But she had no idea what the effects of a werewolf bite,
when the werewolf was still in human form, could do to their behavior. Okay, who’s up for writing more Creature!Ron fics? Seriously. Someone do some more of those. Here we have Ron as a werewolf, aggressive, feral, self-loathing… doesn’t matter, Harry loves him.
Running with the Wolf, Loving the Man snapshots of Harry Potter’s life with a werewolf boyfriend Follow-up of Our Inner Beasts. Someone heard our prayers and gave us more Werewolf!Ron, and it’s as wonderful as it sounds.
What Happened That’s just the thing, though. He doesn’t know what happened. He
can’t pinpoint a single event where everything suddenly made sense.
There was no epiphany or choir of angels or aligning of stars, or any of
the other rubbish Parvarti goes on about in the Great Hall. There’s no
one moment when he realized, “Oh.” Ron and Harry’s friendship, only it’s not just friendship. The last line will make you want to put on some epic music.
Follow The Butterflies “Why did it have to be spiders?” Ron moaned. “Why couldn’t we follow the butterflies?” Harry
privately agreed with his best friend, but if there was anything
Hogwarts had taught him, then that if he didn’t do something, no one
would. “I promise the next time we have to follow anything, it will be
butterflies.” Harry and Ron’s friendship again, with more butterflies thrown in the mix. It’s just as perfect as it sounds. If you don’t ship Harry/Ron, this fanfic might just change your mind.
Sonnets of Magical Interference Harry receives some strange notes about his love life, or lack thereof. By the end of that fic, you might just cheer for a very controversial character.
Heaven Harry’s heaven includes Ron. Features Ron being emotional over a movie, Chinese takeout, and Harry being a sap. What more could you ask for?
Harry Potter And The World That Went Bloody Insane “I know something you don’t know” is, apparently, the essence of Harry
Potter’s love life. Harry’s certain that the world has been reading one
too many romance novels, but then, Harry’s always been a bit oblivious.
Featuring Protective!Attentive!Caring!Ron and Oblivious!Harry in their stinky flat and everyone shipping Harry/Ron. It’s awesome.
Check Mate Harry questions his dreams, Ron has a scary one of his own, Hermione and Cho plot, and Seamus and Dean obsess.
Harry’s subconscious has lots of funny ideas. Ron is ridiculously cute. Might be a bit difficult to read because of FFN’s shitty formating for line breaks.
On The Outside Harry doesn’t think there’s much point to his being gay. He can’t have
regular sex, he can’t have children, and he can’t tell his best friend
he’s in love with him. Ron is utterly adorable, do I really have to say it? Why, yes, yes I do.
Newton’s Law For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction
Check out this author’s other Harry/Ron fics. I especially like Brass Ring; in the meantime, have a rather in-character reaction of Hermione and Ginny finding out about their ex-boyfriends dating. Hey, not my fault if JKR doesn’t know how to write strong female characters without making them abusive.
Sleeping Beauty The most gen ever retelling of Sleeping Beauty. Who cares if it’s gen, it’s amazing. Harry sleeps, Ron is wonderful, and ants get colorful.
The Complexities Of Muggle Machinery Harry bought a refrigerator. Then it was a microwave. Then a blender.
Thursday was the coffee brewer. Ron really liked that last one. Ron is absolutely, heart-stoppingly, adorably cute and pretty much just like I imagine him to be around Muggle things. Harry’s lucky.
After the cupcakes They never really talked about it but they are each other’s world. And
perhaps a lazy Sunday morning is as good a time as any to finally say
something. Utterly sappy and fluffy and you know me, I was mostly there for Harry’s description of Ron. It didn’t disappoint.
Sing Your Love Throughout the years they’ve lived together, Harry has always enjoyed
Ron’s singing but lately he’s been picking up hidden messages in his
flatmate’s song choices. Do you like Ron singing? Do you like Ron dancing? Do you like Ron crying his heart out over an emotionally oblivious Harry? Well in that case you’ve found the perfect fic!
Snakes & Ladders After the
final battle with Voldemort, Harry intends to get on with his life.
There’s just one problem; he was supposed to have died when he
confronted Voldemort in the Forbidden Forest and now the Other Side is
trying to collect him. But in the space between his ‘death’ and the
victory celebrations, Harry’s fallen in love… and he’s not going to
give up his second chance without a fight. A complicated premise, a complicated tale, a very worried Ron, a very determined Harry, an entirely unwelcome Severus Snape coming from beyond the Veil, all leading up to an epic confrontation in the Other Side. Who knew the afterlife had a court?
Now, it’s time for… TEH SMUT! D: Every story below this text will have MATURE CONTENT. Shoo, children, shoo!
Partners (last chapter gets NSFW) What if the girls hadn’t come in just then? What course of action would
Harry, in his desperate frame of mind, have latched onto instead? This fanfic made one of my most desperate wishes come true. For those who don’t know me, I’ll just tell you that Cinderella isn’t a matter of gender.
Scars (warning: mentions of self-harm) Ron is embarrassed of his scars, and Harry might be able to help. Ron
is his terribly self-loathing self, but at least Harry is there to
remind him of what we Ron-lovers know: that he’s loved and beautiful.
The Matchmaker (contains sexual mention) Sir Nicholas has never had a couple like these two…
Nearly-Headless Nick ships Harry and Ron. So does the entire Gryffindor House. All in all, just what we need.
Exploring The Spectrum (NSFW at the end) Ron wakes up to find he can only see in a single colour.
Very interesting mystery and clever use of a forgotten plot point. The resolution is basically “sex solves everything” but otherwise it’s a great story.
Hug! Hug! Kiss! (second-to-last drabble is NSFW) Ron loses Harry in a foreign land. In other words, Harry accidentally joins a Japanese boy band. This story is ridiculous, confusing, crazy, and absolutely hilarious. No existing celebrities were harmed.
Just Another Teenage Epoch – Ron Weasley, 1999 (NSFW at the end) Ron wants to be an Auror, and he wants to not grow up, and he really wants other people to stop kissing Harry. The classic mistletoe tale! Ron is not amused at all. It’s okay, we’re rooting for him (and Harry is, too).
Trapped in Winter(NSFW at the end) Harry and Ron have an argument. When Ron goes to storm out of the room,
he’s frozen in time, and when Harry touches him to see what’s the
matter, they’re both transported to a snowy winter wonderland. A surprising premise that leads to a confused, hurt Ron and a tight-lipped Harry, and of course, to Harry/Ron. Pretty nice!
That We Might Be Exactly Like We Were (warning: graphic self-harm, realistic depression, themes of suicide) ‘Everything just takes me back, to when you were there…’ This author pretty much nails what depression is like. She also has several other Harry/Ron fanfics that are written just as expertly as this one, but be forewarned, they tend to deal with very upsetting topics as well. Sadly, I could see her version of Ron existing in the canon we know.
Slow Slide (get out) to a Better Place (warning: abuse and r*pe) Harry told himself that everything was fine in his relationship with
Ginny, at least until he couldn’t lie to himself anymore. And by then,
he thought it might be too late. Fortunately, he has two very good
friends who will always be there for him, one of whom might eventually
be something more. Downside: Ginny fans should NOT read this story. Upside: contains Vivi’s most beloved ship, Romione + Ronarry.
Prelude and Fugue (NSFW in the middle) It took over an hour, from the time Harry arrived at work, for him to realise just how different today actually was.
The “Groundhog Day” loop is wonderfully done, you can actually feel the weariness building as Harry wakes up and notices it’s still Monday, bloody Monday.
And Ron is absolutely adorable – yes, I’ll say it every time!
Princes of Maine (NSFW at the end) Harry wakes one morning to find an abandoned baby on his doorstep.
Little does he know that this is only the beginning of his most
challenging adventure yet: parenthood. You want Harry as a single parent and not knowing anything about babies? You have it. You want Ron as a competent Healer who’s sick of Harry’s shit and determined to get answers as to why his best mate is a wreck? You have it. You want Harry/Ron? What are you waiting for, dive in!
Headcanonsandmore 