i initially moved to quebec to put distance between me and my sexual abuser, although he is incarcerated i couldnt really leave my house and was unable to hold a job without having a panic attack.
i now live with my partner desmone and their mother. their mother is violent and verbally abusive toward desmone, she threatens physical abuse to them and has followed through in the past. she throws things at desmone and punches things when she is upset, and threatens to throw me out as a means to control them. she has kicked one of her own children out before.
she has threatened suicide on multiple occasions. she refuses to call desmone their name, constantly deadnaming them and otherwise making them dysphoric by invading their personal space.
i am trying to get on government aid here so i can learn the language enough to start working but i dont know when or if i will be accepted for that. currently we need money for groceries but it would be nice if we could save enough for rent (400$) for the room we have lined up incase we need to leave or get kicked out
(tldr; me and my partner are in an unhealthy living environment and need to save enough money incase we are kicked out)
you can donate here https://www.paypal.me/fifthbeta , + message me here or through discord @seraphmina#8743
i made this post quickly yesterday (august 21) because there was another incident and forgot to add that both me and desmone are open to commissions for anyone who donates.
my art ex. : sketch (x), lineart (x), flat colors (x), painting (x)
desmone’s commission post is here
please reblog this version instead!
update (it is august 24) we got about 30$ in donations which covers groceries for a week or two if we stretch it- thank you for all the reblogs so far.
i have to stop my fluoxetine cold turkey today since i am not set up with a doctor. it would be really helpful if donations could cover the (15$) cost of getting my photo taken for a quebec health insurance card so i can get that done
literally if any of my current followers from moving blog donated 1$ we’d have 100$ and if everyone on the old poly blog donated like 50 cents we’d have 1k$ gfdihgfduhg the most little of donation can help us out or at least just reblog, please
Tag: tw: rape
friendly reminder that famous viner curtis lepore is a rapist.
as long as people are still watching his vines I will keep reblogged this
He lost 4.4 million followers over all of this. Let’s take him down the last 400k
#ChallengeFuckingAccepted
he still has 4M subs on insta. spread this like wildfire. we can’t fucking let him prosper
Christ, this guy is a fucking creep.
QHATTTT
ron weasley was eleven years old when he decided he was willing to sacrifice himself for harry and hermione in that godfuckingdamnit chess game
ron weasley was 12 when he literally burped slugs for 2 days straight for defending hermione and he went to the forbidden forest despite his fear of spiders with harry to help the hermione and the other muggleborns, not to mention the fact he gathered all their homework and bring it to her in the enfermary
he was ONLY THIRTEEN when he stood on one leg to face a guy everyone thought was a huge ass killer and was willing AGAIN to die for both of his friends.
he used his prefect status to protect harry when he was fifteen, he went to the department of misteryes in a heartbit for harry.
he opened his house for harry and hermione who never knew nothing about the wizarding world. he stood up for hermione when snape called her a know it all and went to detention again for his friends.
he made all the mistakes a teenager would make trying to understand his feelings for a girl he was always head over heels (he talks about hermione being book smart all the times in the books)
he became a men in a war who was not fair and he could hide behind his blood status. he made mistakes as well but so did harry and hermione. he was a solid person with a heart of gold and wanted to sacrifice his life until the very endTM even after grieving fred (you stay here with hermione and i’ll go harry!!)
he was one of the most loyal characters on the book, a good friend and a good person but the harry potter fandom deadass says he was a bad friend for harry bc goblet of fire i guess?? and don’t let get me started on everyone shipping hermione with literally everyone (bellatrix even, who may i remind you would let greyback r*a*e her after the torture, draco who called her a mudblood since day one and snape who was the most infuriating person with hermione as well) but ron lmao what the fuck happened? i blame jk
EVERYBODY SHOULD READ THIS!!!!!!!!!
REBLOG…IT CAN SAVE A LIFE OR TWO!!!
WARNING: Some knew about the red light on cars, but not Dialing 112.
An UNMARKED police car pulled up behind her and put his lights on. Lauren’s parents have always told her to never pull over for an unmarked car on the side of the road, but rather to wait until they get to a gas station, etc.Lauren had actually listened to her parents advice, and promptly called, 112 on her cell phone to tell the police dispatcher that she would not pull over right away. She proceeded to tell the dispatcher that there was an unmarked police car with a flashing red light on his rooftop behind her. The dispatcher checked to see if there were police cars where she was and there weren’t, and he told her to keep driving, remain calm and that he had back up already on the way.
Ten minutes later 4 cop cars surrounded her and the unmarked car behind her. One policeman went to her side and the others surrounded the car behind. They pulled the guy from the car and tackled him to the ground. The man was a convicted rapist and wanted for other crimes.
I never knew about the 112 Cell Phone feature. I tried it on my AT&T phone & it said, “Dialing Emergency Number.”
Especially for a woman alone in a car, you should not pull over for an unmarked car. Apparently police have to respect your right to keep going on to a safe place.*Speaking to a service representative at Bell Mobility confirmed that 112 was a direct link to State trooper info. So, now it’s your turn to let your friends know about “Dialing, 112”
You may want to send this to every Man, Woman & Youngster you know; it may well save a life.
This applies to ALL 50 states
PLEASE PASS ALONG TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY, IT CAN SAVE A LIFE….Works in Canada too guys, just tried it!
Reblogging for anyone of the feminine preference that follow me. (Or for general knowledge.)
112 is actually a universal emergency number, it works all over the world. So if you don’t know the specific regional emergency number (like 911) just dial 112 and you will get help.
Btw! 112 is also the Swedish police number! Just a heads up!
I’ve seen this on my dash a couple of times with various additions so leaving a reply here for my followers: 112 is not a universal number. 911 is what you want in the States, like most of us were taught growing up. Anyways, wherever you live or vacation, make it a point to know the local emergency info.
“A co-worker closed the door to the staff room behind him.
It locked automatically
and I started planning what I could use as a weapon:
smash the glass beside the sink into his eye.
pick up the fork next to me and sink it into his leg.
claw him across the face if I couldn’t get to anything in time.
As I calculated how hard it would be to shove his body weight off of me,
he finished making his lunch, said, “Sup,” and left,
the door automatically locking behind him.
I expect if I told him I was prepared to stab him with the corner of my staff ID if I had to,
he would say what I’ve heard too often, the one we all know
but are getting wearily suspicious of:
Not all men are like That. When I was eleven, all the girls in my class got sent to self-defence
because they assumed we’d need it one day.
When I was twelve, there was a prostitute’s body dumped in the river next to my house
because someone thought she was disposable.
When I was thirteen, it happened again and this time the man went to jail
and people stood outside the courtroom and held up signs that he did the right thing.
When I was fourteen, my friend showed up to a sleepover late, chest heaving from sobbing
and from running four blocks after getting chased by a man that followed her off the bus.
When I was fifteen, my mother accused me of being a Man Hater
and I said, “No, but god, would you blame me if I was?” I got catcalled and then got laughed at when I flipped them off.
they pulled up beside me and I clutched my bag tighter,
my hand going in for my keys and my mind going over how their noses would look
if I smashed them in with my elbow.
“What’s the big deal,” the guy at the steering wheel asked. “We’re just complimenting you. We’re not like That.” Sorry, but I’m not going to trust you in case I end up on a poster labelled ‘MISSING.’
Even if you seem like the nicest guy, I’ll still have one hand holding my keys as the only knife I’m allowed, because I don’t know how far you’re going to take it:
if you won’t back off when I tell you I don’t want to date you
if you’ll shout BITCH at me when I don’t respond well to your catcall
if you’ll expect my body as a reward for treating me like a human being
if you’ll try to take what you think you’re owed by being a man
if you’ll turn me into another statistic that people shudder away from. I have been trained to assume the lamb is a wolf in sheep’s clothing
or face the consequences.
I don’t know if you’ll nod when I reject you
or pump me full of bullets. Every single woman I’ve talked to has a story where they haven’t felt safe in their own body
because of what a man said or did. Not all men are like That, but god, it’s enough.”— ‘Welcome to Girlhood: None Of Us Are Safe,’ theappleppielifestyle. (via theappleppielifestyle)
5 Ways ‘Asian Woman Fetishes’ Put Asian Women in Serious Danger
Recently, a friend and I were talking about growing up Asian American in predominantly white neighborhoods and schools, and she told me that when she was in fifth grade, boys teased her on the playground by saying that she had a “sideways vagina.”
This has happened to me, too – and I’m sure to so many other Asian girls.
From racist humor in mid-1800s brothels to today’s playground jokes, the race and gender identity of Asian women is seen as so foreign, so “alien,” that our vaginas magically defy biology.
Throughout my life, I’ve received unwanted comments and questions about my body, specifically my anatomy, including being harassed on the street with calls like, “Ni hao,” “Konichiwa,” “Are you Chinese, Japanese, or Korean,” and recently, “Hi Ling Ling.”
On top of that, in my dating history, I was expected to be more quiet and less assertive.
The hyper-sexualization and fetishization of East Asian women is problematic – I am not “lucky” that my race and gender is imagined as sexy and exotic, that Asian women “all so beautiful.”
Or that, an image search of “Asian women” pulls up excessive pictures of women posing in lingerie.
Racial fetishes are about objectification, fetishizing an entire group of people – in this case Asian women, means reducing them down to stereotypes instead of recognizing their full personhood.
Beyond just personal preferences or “having a type,” racial fetishes project desired personality and behavior onto an entire racial or ethnic group.
The fetishization of Asian women even has a name, “yellow fever” – as if the obsession with Asian women were also a disease.
When my identity as an “Asian woman” becomes the only thing that’s important to someone in an interaction, that’s a problem.
This is different from an interracial partnership where all partners are equally respected. Fetishizing someone’s race and gender means not caring about someone as an individual.
So, where did the fetishization and objectification come from? How did Asian women get the hypersexualized stereotypes of being docile and submissive or being dangerous and seductive?
While today, some people might think of fetishes and sexual stereotypes as “not a big deal,” the history behind these tropes is rooted in violence and war, which get oppressively reimagined by mainstream media and entertainment.
Below are five ways East Asian women became fetishized and how that fetishization horribly impacts our lives.
1. Mainstream Media Creates the Submissive ‘Lotus Blossom’ and Evil ‘Dragon Lady’ Stereotypes
“[S]mall, weak, submissive and erotically alluring…She’s fun, you see, and so uncomplicated. She doesn’t go to assertiveness-training classes, insist on being treated like a person, fret about career moves…” —Tony Rivers, “Oriental Girls”, Gentleman’s Quarterly, 1990
Growing up, Lucy Liu was one of the only East Asian women I saw on TV and in movies. It was her, the Yellow Power Ranger (Thuy Trang), and Mulan.
For me, Liu is badass – both for being one of the only Asian American actresses in mainstream Hollywood and also for playing roles that literally kick ass.
However, many of her roles throughout the 90s and early 2000s, such as Ling Woo on Ally McBeal or as O-Ren Ishii in Kill Bill, were also ones that showed Asian women as beautifullyevil, aggressive, and also mysterious.
Asian women are often stereotyped as either the dangerously cunning “Dragon Lady” that seduces White men, leading to their inevitable downfall, or as the submissive “Lotus Blossom.”
Both are meant to be demeaning and demonizing.
While there are exceptions, for the most part, mainstream media has created one dimensional, sexualized representations of Asian women that have affected the way they’re perceived by others.
Chinese actress Anna May Wong, the first Asian American actress to be internationally famous in the 1920s, was often cast in stereotypical supporting roles – and passed over for leading roles of Asian characters, which were given to white actresses in yellowface.
One of her most recognized characters was the demure, respectful Lotus Flower in The Toll of the Sea. The demure, subservient, and delicate “Lotus Blossom” stereotype is intended to cast Asian women as “less than,” both in terms of race and gender.
These stereotypes are seriously harmful. In the US, up to 61% of Asian women experience physical and/or sexual violence by an intimate partner during her lifetime.
Being docile is specifically about being deferent and obedient, especially to the authority of men.
As our race, gender, and sexuality become ruled by Western and male fantasy, in order to serve men sexually, Asian women must both be “feminine” and “heterosexual” and also either submissive and/or hypersexual.
These double stereotypes of “Lotus Blossom” and “Dragon Lady” reflect the ways that Asian women become transformed into either a sexual servant or embodied as a sexual adventure.
2. Labeling Products ‘Oriental’ Leads to the Objectification of East Asian Women as Exotic Commodities
Have you heard of Oriental rugs or Oriental lamps? What do those have in common? They’re objects.
“Oriental” was used as an adjective by “the West” to describe “the East.” And now, it’s often represented as anything with dragons, lotus blossoms, red lanterns, and other “mystical” symbols from the “Far East.”
The historical and media image and idea of “Oriental” also ends up lumping together all “Asian women” as East Asian and also conflates Chinese, Japanese, and Korean identities.
The “Orientalizing” of Asian women is a historical process where race, gender, class, immigration status, and also empire all play a role.
Since trade routes that opened up in the 1200s, notably the Silk Road, White adventurers sought to find exotic goods in the “Far East” – not only spices and fabrics, but women as well. (Netflix’s recent series Marco Polo retells this “White-guy-in-Asia” story.)
As seemingly faraway cultures and places begin being defined by objects and artifacts, these so-called exotic aesthetics end up getting imposed onto people and their physical appearance.
Similarly, Asian women become defined by their “jet black hair,” “dark almond eyes,” or “petite figure,” and that’s part of that objectification.
Like a porcelain vase, Asian women are often seen as decorative and fragile. Transformed intopassive commodities of sex, our bodies must also be seen as weak and submissive – dainty, delicate, and small.
This shows up in everyday ways that men perceive sex with Asian women as something to collect. There’s a scene in Wedding Crashers where Vince Vaughn screams, “That was my first Asian!” Sadly, that line is used often in real life.
Like many other Asian women who have tried online dating, when I was on OKCupid, I received messages such as, “I’ve never been with an Asian before. Are you as exotic in bed as you look?” or “You’re a beautiful, delicate flower. Do you need someone to protect you?”
These expectations and demands on our external bodies also end up getting internalized – my identity as both Asian and a woman is constantly under scrutiny.
3. Exclusive Immigration Policies Create Perception of Asian Women as ‘Immoral’
Immigration policies affected the ways Asian women were perceived by White Americans.
Specific to the US, one example comes from Chinese American history. During the 1800s, most of Chinese people in the US were immigrant men working as low-cost laborers. The sexual interactions of Chinese immigrants were controlled by immigration laws and laws that prohibited interracial sexual relationships.
Many Chinese women who immigrated to the US around that time were women that were deceived and kidnapped or trafficked into serving this group of Chinese men.
Eventually, they also established White clientele, and racial stereotypes began to emerge that Chinese women were luring White men towards sin and expanded the trope of people in the sex industry as irresponsible and dangerous.
“Yellow Peril” anti-Chinese immigration sentiments also created the threatening perception of Asian women as “greedy, devious, and immoral.” The Page Act of 1875 prohibited “undesirable” immigrants from entering the US.
Other acts, like the “Gentlemen’s Agreement” discontinued passports for Japanese laborers to the US and Hawaii. However, it allowed women and children to join husbands, leading to over 10,000 Japanese and Korean women came to the US as arranged “picture brides.”
This practice was looked down upon by White Americans, adding to anti-Japanese sentiment at that time.
After World War II, Congress also passed the War Bride Act, where those serving abroad were allowed to bring Japanese and European wives home and Americans saw Japanese wives as virtuous homemakers.
Yet, while Asian men with picture brides were decidedly immoral, it was acceptable for White American soldiers to have war brides.
Today, the fantasy of having an overseas Asian wife continues through the “mail order bride” industry, which continues to both commercialize women and put them in vulnerable positions. In this industry, women can literally be “returned and exchanged.”
4. US Military Representations in Pop Culture Construct Asian Women as Subservient to White Men
“ The Problem of Miss Saigon makes us believe that we are worth less, that it is only through the white lover’s touch that we may be conferred a fuller humanity.” —Kai Cheng Thom
While the “East meets West” narrative is centuries overdone, literary and film history plays a role in the construction of Asian women as subservient.
In 1887, Pierre Loti wrote the novel Madame Chrysantheme about a French officer going to Japan to find a “dainty” and “delicate” woman “not much bigger than a doll.”
This becomes the main basis for Puccini’s 1904 opera Madame Butterfly. The gist is that an American soldier travels to Japan and takes on a Japanese wife.
He leaves her to return to legitimately marry a White American woman, and she ends up killing herself.
This storyline repeats itself in various films with settings across locations throughout Asia. Later, the 1989 musical Miss Saigon resets the narrative in Vietnam.
The problem with the Miss Saigon and Madame Butterfly storyline is that in these novels, plays, and films, Asian women from different places end up homogenized and literally depicted as ornamental objects created for the sole purpose of White men’s pleasure.
Later films and novels like The World of Suzie Wong embellished the Western soldier seeks Asian bride narrative by adding a savior element –Asian women needed to be rescued and protected by White men.
This narrative is something that I’ve internalized. I’ve found myself wondering in previous relationships and never truly being able to articulate out loud: Are you just trying to experience what it’s like being with an Asian woman? Are you just with me because I’m Asian?
As it turns out, these fictional tales and stories are also a big part of history.
5. War and Military Presence Produce Even More Sexual Violence
Throughout history, the sexual violence against women is used as a wartime weapon and women are seen as part of the “spoils of war.”
In World War II, Japan enslaved approximately 200,000 women across Asia, including Korea, China, Taiwan, Indonesia, and the Philippines to provide sex for its troops. Women were raped by multiple men every day.
After Japan surrendered to the United States, US occupation authorities approved of continuing the system for US troops, setting up a network of brothels under a “Recreation and Amusement Association.”
Military presence impacts local economies – for women who are poor, the sex industry offers an opportunity to make a living.
US military presence in Asia led to the creation of local sex industries and sex trafficking rings that would serve soldiers. Some of the first encounters soldiers ever had with Asian women were around the idea that these women were there to serve them sexually.
By the end of the Vietnam War, around 300,000 South Vietnamese women were working within the sex industry.
Although many women suffer horrible working conditions including assault and violence, institutions are more interested in turning women into commodities to serve military clientele then in the wellbeing of the women.
Also, thanks to Stanley Kubrick’s Full Metal Jacket, the experiences of these woman have been reduced down to one line: “Me so horny. Me love you long time.” Strangers will ask me on the street or in bars, “Will you love me long time?”
This historical violence carries on its legacy today in large scale ways. Human trafficking of domestic and sex workers continues to exploit women as commodities.
Over 30,000 Asian women are trafficked into the US each year.
Wars against Japan, Korea, the Philippines, and Vietnam have also created national imagery that gets represented in pop culture and then get internalized by any Americans who may not know any Asians or Asian Americans.
Asian nations and the people from them are perceived as both dangerous as well as desired objects of conquest.
***
The objectification and fetishization of Asian women comes out of devastating wars and exclusionary immigration practices that get re-transcribed by books, movies, and other mass-consumed media.
While some folks might think that these sexual stereotypes are a “compliment” or “positive,” the ongoing violence perpetrated against Asian women as a direct result of these stereotypes get overlooked.
Objectification is about being seen as less than human. As unworthy of anything else but a singular use and function.
Asian and Asian American women continue to be objectified sexually through cultural consumption and misrepresentation in ways that also have negative day-to-day impacts, from commuting to dating.
5 Ways ‘Asian Woman Fetishes’ Put Asian Women in Serious Danger
Harry Potter universe against abuse and rape.
That should receive a medal.
Yes. I can 100% see this becoming a real thing (and, like @disneyprinceronweasley suggested, this campaign was probably started by Ron). But also, the thread for this post is a bit off. Half the people commenting seem to think Ginny used a love potion on Harry (where did you get that idea from?), and someone-else argued that love potions must have happened with Ron and Hermione because (and I quote) ‘the genius fell in love with an idiot’. I don’t understand this fandom.
Seriously, Ron’s a chess master and brilliant strategist; where (in the name of Merlin) did you get the idea that he’s an idiot?
I’ll tell you where @headcanonsandmore Steve kloves
Also i would like to point out that Romilda Vane never got punished by a teacher or even told off by a student ( Hermione and Ginny???? Where were you at????) for smuggling a love potion into school, giving it to Harry and also indirectly leading to a near death accident so wtf
@acciocuteboysplease That sounds about right. And yeah, I’m shocked that Romilda Vane never got punishment for that. You would have thought Hermione and Ginny (or even other Gryffindors) would have reported her to a teacher, since her actions indirectly led to a near-death experience for another student.
Harry Potter universe against abuse and rape.
That should receive a medal.
Yes. I can 100% see this becoming a real thing (and, like @disneyprinceronweasley suggested, this campaign was probably started by Ron). But also, the thread for this post is a bit off. Half the people commenting seem to think Ginny used a love potion on Harry (where did you get that idea from?), and someone-else argued that love potions must have happened with Ron and Hermione because (and I quote) ‘the genius fell in love with an idiot’. I don’t understand this fandom.
Seriously, Ron’s a chess master and brilliant strategist; where (in the name of Merlin) did you get the idea that he’s an idiot?
!!!!!!! ATTENTION !!!!! PLEASE READ VERY IMPORTANT !!!!!!!
Just a Reminder that Donald Trump is and always has been an abuser. A third woman has now accused Mr. Trump of rape.
A woman filed a lawsuit claiming that when she was thirteen years old she was held as a sex slave to Mr. Trump and his friend Jeffrey Epstein. The woman claimed to have a witness, “Tiffany Doe,” to the incidents. Mr. Epstein is a notorious “billionaire pedophile” who is now a Level 3 registered sex offender – the most dangerous kind, “a threat to public safety” — after being convicted of misconduct with another underage girl.
Mr. Trump has a long history of debasing women he’s worked with, crossing the line on a regular basis. He’s taken lifelong joy in objectifying women, including his proclamation: “Women, you have to treat ‘em like shit.”
He’s also
been accused of worse than just misogynist language. Two prior women have accused Mr. Trump, in court documents, of actual or attempted sexual assault. (Mr. Trump denies all the allegations.) In fact, Under oath, Ivana Trump accused Mr. Trump of a violent rape. First was Ivana Trump, Donald Trump’s first wife, who said under oath in a 1989 deposition that he had violently attacked her, ripped out her hair and forcibly penetrated her without her consent.
READ HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION
#StayWoke
“For us personally, meeting Hermione Granger was like…. She’s transitioned out of that since, but not to us. She’s Hermione to us. I met her when she was really really young, she came to a Lakers game. but to see her there with my wife was pretty cool”
-Kobe Bryant on meeting Emma at the Oscar’sYou’ll have a terrible haircut like that yet you won’t make it bushy for a bushy haired character you played.
Not to put a damper on this, but wasn’t Kobe Bryant accused of and charged with rape?
@headcanonsandmore – yes and yes, actually. The thing is that it came down to he said/she said and even after he was arrested and charged, the victim refused to testify, even though later she sued in civil court which was settled out of court, with an apology but no admittance of guilt.
Personally, I think he was able to buy his way out of it because of his wealth, and buy his wife’s allegiance back by the enormous rock on her finger a few months later.
Sorry to say but a man (or woman) having infidelity is a huge, gargantuan turn-off. It’s an actual squick on my part.
Yeesh. Yeah, it seems really squicky to me too.